Missions Sundays: the fearful feat of hosting a missionary – how to survive to tell about it

This is a guest post by Jonathan Templeton. He and his family are going to be partnering with the Fulks and others in facilitating a Church Planting Movement in the least-evangelized spanish-speaking country, Spain. You can check out their website here.

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Over the last twenty months of deputation our family has traveled approximately 35,000 miles, communicated our ministry in four countries, three languages, and fourteen states. Naturally, we are invited to share many a meal with folks. To be precise, my wife and I have dinned out 89 times and eaten a formal meal in someone’s home 65 times. God graciously has provided for our family through many who invited us over to share a meal in their home. You can imagine however, how hard it is to keep off the pounds!

More to the point, we have learned first-hand how you can host missionaries and make them feel welcome in your home. In addition we have learned from numerous families the valuable lesson of how we too can be good hosts. Yet some have timidly asked, how should I host a missionary? Let me share with you a few a ways you can entertain missionaries and not feel uncomfortable or have your missionary guests experience an awkward meal.

1. We are NOT more-holy-than-thou.

Often times a question communicates more than is intended. In this case the question, “how should I host a missionary?” certainly does. It communicates that one, the missionaries are difficult to host or two, they are difficult to relate too. I won’t deny that the first can be true. Yet the later more frequently tends be the case, and this is due to the fact that missionaries are oftentimes placed on a spiritual pedestal. Naturally it will be difficult to relate to a missionary who you may view as one of heaven’s elite and therefore distant. Missionaries are NOT more-holy-than-thou. We have the same sinful tendencies and wrestle with the same issues as you do. Our vocations are different, but we hit our funny bone just like you do. Do not feel you are inferior in some way to your guest missionary.

 

2. Be willing to split an apple in four.

An Italian friend once challenged me to invite people over to our house even if all we had was an apple to split four ways. He went on to say, that there is something about a meal that creates fellowship and fosters friendships. Perhaps the middle-eastern cultures are not too off the mark in placing great value in sharing a meal with someone. And so conversation around food oftentimes cultivates a relationship for food becomes a conversation piece that allows for two or more individuals to share something in common. So don’t be afraid to have a missionary couple over to your house even if you only have an apple and peanut butter to share. I think you will be pleasantly surprised at the relationship that results.

 

3. Come prepared with thought provoking questions.

Sometimes we arrive at a home, and it is clear they feel intimidated by us and are somewhat bashful in striking up a conversation. Here is a useful tip that we try to use when going to a home for dinner. My father taught me this. Come prepared with a handful of questions. Your kids can even participate in this. And you already have one leg up on them since you know what they do and where they live. So ask them one question at a time, but search for a follow-up question. This does require listening and not just hearing. Don’t be too focused on your next question or you will miss catching a good follow-up question. If during the conversation you learn they have a particular interest, gear your questions toward this subject. Being a well-rounded reader will enable you to ask questions on a variety of subjects. Recently I was listening to an audiobook on a submarine from World War II. It just so happened that the music director from this church was a submariner. That book went a long way for me in conversation.

 

4. Don’t keep us guessing.

The moment we walk into your home, a dozen or more questions swarm into our minds. Should I take my shoes off at the front door or keep them on? Should I stay standing in the hallway or head to the family room and have a seat? Where do I sit at the table; at the end, in the middle, by wife? There are many more questions swirling through our minds. It’s helpful to know what are the unspoken customs in your home. We are so accustomed to them that we forget to tell our guests. The last thing I want to do is sit in papa bear’s chair. Simply put, tell us what to do. This helps us feel at ease and comfortable with you in your home.

Would you add anything?

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